Marie Claire South Africa by Helen Wallace
While dating apps have their fair share of conveniences, digital dating comes with pitfalls as well, the most obvious one being that we don’t really know who we are speaking to. I went through a lengthy Tinder stage myself and while most of my experiences were positive, I definitely encountered a number of creeps along the way. There are plenty out there. While there is no guarantee that someone who seems nice online won’t be a total letdown face-to-face, here are five dating-profile red flags to look out for so that you can spare yourself time, heartache and data.
1. They Have No Bio
I would always swipe left on these people, no matter how good-looking they were. Why? WHO ARE YOU? Even if you are only looking for a casual hook-up, there will no doubt need to be a certain level of communicating. And, if you are anything like me, half, if not more, of finding yourself attracted to someone is being attracted to their personality. If you are looking for a relationship then not only will you not be able to get an idea of what the person is like, but it also just shows a lack of interest and commitment on their part. Pass!
2. The Travel Enthusiast or Sexy Foreigner
There are two sides to this complex coin. On the one hand, there is nothing wrong with wanting to travel, I wish I had more stamps in my passport, but it also suggests that this person has no intention of sticking around. I remember from my not-so-distant dating app days that there were a lot of foreigners looking for ‘tour guides’ to show them a ‘good time’ in the city. This isn’t even code for, but rather directly saying ‘this is a hook-up because I’ll be outta here soon.’ In other words, don’t get your hopes up (unless that’s what you’re looking for).
3. ‘Good vibes only’
We all like to have a good time. That should go without saying. But unfortunately in the digital dating world, it doesn’t. ‘Good vibes only’ is another one of those sneaky modern codes, which essentially translates to ‘I don’t want anything serious and that goes for conversations too.’ This is someone who will no doubt discount your feelings if he feels they are standing in the way of his enjoyment. With loads of other people, whenever they want to. The only thing worse would be if they wrote ‘vibez.’ Ugh. Proceed with caution.
4. Revealing Selfies
There are exceptions to this rule. Maybe it’s a candid shot of them on the beach in their swimwear – innocent enough. You know what should make your creep radar go into overdrive? Sultry selfies that contain very little clothing and a whole lot of suggestiveness, especially if they don’t have their face in the picture. If you want something quick this won’t be a problem. For people looking for something more serious, bear in mind that like-minded people will probably try and lead with their brains rather than their bodies (or go for both). Even if it IS just a shallow dating app.
5. Listing Partner Preferences
‘No fat chicks’, ‘no crazy chicks’, ‘hot chicks only’… we’ve seen them ALL before. And to be honest, it’s 2017 – a time where ignorance and prejudice are, thankfully, no longer welcome. People who list their likes and dislikes, and do so using offensive language, are probably not going to make great partners. Kindness and sensitivity are qualities most people would list in an ideal partner, so why swipe right on an self-declared bigot?
It’s tough out there in the dating sphere and there will always be idiots roaming in that space. The best advice is to trust your gut – intuition can play an integral role in your online dating life and help to separate the wheat from the chaff. Swipe and type wisely and you could find yourself lucky in love.
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